City Trippin'

Yesterday I took A. for our trip to see Santa at Union Square. Last year we drove, this year we took BART (kind of like a cross between Amtrack and a subway for those not familiar with it.)

Of course A. had a grand time on the train for the first time. She was a little bored because I neglected to bring anything for her to do, but she talked to the other passengers and looked out of the window trying to sound out all the station identification signs. At one point, A. started pointing out that almost all of the passengers were by themselves. "They aren't married, because they are alone," she announced. So we talked about how maybe people were married but their spouse wasn't with them. "You aren't married," She said and I agreed, but told her I had been married to her daddy. "I wish my daddy could see me when I am a big kid" and I agreed that I wish that too. We had a little moment of sadness and a hug before she moved on to killing my camera battery by taking a bunch of pictures of my shoes and the floor.

We got to the City at about 11 so we decided to walk up to Union Square and have lunch right away. On the way I needed to pick up batteries so we stopped at Walgreens where A. found a stuffed animal that she "HAD" to have. I told her that I wasn't going to lug anything right now, and maybe we could stop on the way back. (Of course, not really meaning it. Because she already has an army of stuffed animals and has procured 2 more already this week.)

We had a grand time having lunch at the Cheesecake Factory overlooking the square. A. was impressed by the really large tree and one of the buildings has a huge rotating star on top that was "amazing". She was suspicious about why I was letting her eat "All. This. SUGAR!?!?" But that didn't stop her from digging in. (She miraculously managed to eat without getting it all over her white shirt.) After lunch we went to have pictures with Santa and pick out her annual Christmas tree ornament. (Hi I am Alicia and I have an ornament buying problem. I have no doubt purchased 5-8 ornaments this year already.) Then she led me on a galloping tour of the Squares open spaces.

I laughed so hard it I had tears when she showed her true colors as her mother's daughter. She was galloping along the square when suddenly she stopped in the middle of the block and announced that we REALLY had to cross the street. I didn't really see anything that would attract a 4 year old on the other side, but I was feeling indulgent. I have found trips like this are much less stressful if I just follow her lead (except when it is critical or safety related). So I took her to the crosswalk, and we crossed. She made her way back down the block to where we had been opposite, and marched right into a store. The Nine West store. Where she promptly marched up to a display, plunked a shimmery gold platform heel off of the display. (It was quite a beautiful shoe.) Then she announced that we needed to buy it. I explained that it wasn't for little kids and she gave me a look that said clearly I was a dolt as she explained, "It isn't for ME, it's for YOU." Trying to explain to a four year old that my life doesn't have much in it that requires high heels while the sales person looked on was kind of annoying and funny all at once. I finally told her that she could look at all the shoes I have in the closet that I don't wear and pick something for me to wear out of there.

After the shoe store, A. announced she was tired and ready to go home. We swung by the Disney store where she begged for a Cinderella Doll and I bought her princess pens instead. She was happy to draw pictures on the ride back. But when we got off the train she was indignant. Why were we going home when she was having SUCH a good time on the train? Then she settled down and ran off to play with the neighbor as soon as we got home.

Of course, as soon as she lied down for bed last night, she popped back up and demanded to know WHY we didn't go back and get that puppy from Walgreens. She cried and railed against me for a bit about how "wrong" I was and insisted that I go get it "tomorrow morning, first thing" which was met with a denial. When I pointed out that she already got 2 new stuffed animals this week, new princess pens and an ornament, and that perhaps she should better use her energy feeling grateful for what she does have because there are many kids who don't have a lot of things that she does, she sobbed "But I LOVED it" one last time and quieted down for bed. After a few minutes she said "Thank you for the pens and a lot of fun." So maybe I am not raising a total brat after all, in spite of the rather blatant spoiling that occurs some times.

Holiday Traditions

My family didn't have a lot of traditions when I was growing up. We had a few, on your birthday you always got one quarter for every year old you were. The birthday person always got to pick dinner too, and my mom would make it (or attempt to make it). I was pretty uncomplicated. I think every year I asked for either Tuna Noodle Casserole or Potatoes Au Gratin with Ham. My brother Alex asked for all kinds of (seemingly) random things like Bouillabaisse. I think Brian asked for spaghetti about 4 years in a row. In the summer we always had "pajama rides" when all the kids would get into their jammies and my dad would drive us out to another town, buy us ice cream and drive around until we fell asleep in the back seat.

For Christmas, we would have a Christmas Eve tradition. On Christmas Eve everyone got to open 3 presents, a book, a pair of pajamas and one present picked from under the tree. (Santa hadn't been there yet and the parents hadn't put out presents, so you had to go with gifts from the extended family.) That is the only thing we did that I would really call a "tradition" but I think in some ways the way that families conduct holidays are sort of a fingerprint of the family. The components are usually there, but everyone does them a little different. Does Santa wrap or deliver out into the open? Does everyone take turns or is it a wrapping paper frenzy with everyone digging in at once? Are presents separated under the tree into piles for each person or is it all jumbled together?

I remember my parents disagreeing about how to handle these things when I was a kid. My mom's family was unwrapped santa presents followed by a free for all. (I can imagine that with 11 kids in the family, unwrapping one at time would take approximately FOREVER.) My dad thought that we should pass the presents around and watch each other open the presents, and also we should wait until after breakfast. (TORTURE!) In the end the came to a sort of compromise, Santa presents were unwrapped and we were allowed to play with them and our stocking offerings as soon as we woke up, but everything else had to wait until after a fairly healthy breakfast. (Which was always at least partially ruined by candy canes, lifesavers and hershey's kisses from the stockings.)

When I got to be a late teen, I added day of baking and a trip to the city for shopping. I had to give them up when A was born, but I that this year she may be old enough for them. When my niece was about A's age, we added a day decorating gingerbread houses with Grandma and a trip for all the women in the family to the Nutcracker. In some ways, I am beginning to think that if I add any more traditions to this holiday, it is going to be more stressful than fun.

C's family added some of their own traditions to the mix. Their family has always done all the Christmas gift opening on Christmas Eve. This is a bit of a double edge sword. There is never a decision to be made about where to spend Christmas. It is just a fact that Christmas Eve is with C's parents, and Christmas Day is with mine. But the addition of a fair influx of presents makes the book and jammies that I give my girl a little less special than it was to me. (And I have completely cut out the picking a presents, because HELLO she already gets a ton.) We also don't do stocking hanging or Santa hot chocolate and cookie leaving, because we stay at the grandparent's house until bed time and she falls asleep en route to the next house.

At some point some of the traditions or the fingerprint of our holidays may change. (I am sure that at some time it would be nice to be in our OWN house for Christmas.) But for now this week holds some days to bake, next weekend is the Nutcracker, and somewhere in the future is a trip on Bart to see Union Square. (Maybe I will take A. ice skating, or maybe not yet.)

I can only hope that this year A. doesn't do what I did the year I was four. I believe that was the year that my brothers and I woke up at 4 AM and discovered that Santa had given me a record player. We Mousersized and Disco Ducked our way through to 6:30 am much to the chagrin of our parents who steadfastly refused to get out of bed, no matter how loud we played the record player and despite the fact that I believe at least one of us kids decided to wake them up by play the "cymbals" (pot lids) in their room. I honestly don't know how we didn't die that Christmas morning.

Ornaments

I was all gung ho to come in here today and post about my voyeuristic tendencies at grocery stores. I was going to speculate on what my grocery cart says about me, and what yours might say about you, but then I got a book out of the library and, lo and behold, the intro of the book is exactly that. It made me feel unoriginal and frankly like posting my observations would kind of make me a hack and a plagiarizer, so you (The roughly 4 people who actually read this, which includes my dad. Hi, Dad!) are going to have to get something else instead.

Today Audrey and I started getting into the thick of unpacking Christmas decorations. The weekend after Thanksgiving, I bought some new lights and a blow up thing for outside and put them up, but we hadn't touched the Christmas boxes that are stored so lovingly in my shed. (By lovingly, I mean they are tossed in there sort of haphazardly and covered in spiderwebs.) So we took them out today in preparation for obtaining a tree tomorrow, or possibly so that I could just say "Please be careful with that" until my head explodes, whatever comes first.

Pulling out the ornaments always reminds me of where I got them. I try to collect an ornament when I travel or go on vacation these days. I used to collect coffee mugs, but that led to me lugging home 15 mugs from Europe when I went to visit a friend who was living there. I think I finally ditched the last of those last year, a mere 15 years later. Because leaving them around was a talking point that I didn't want, "Oh yes, I got that when I went to Kassel with my friend who was living in Germany.....Was it a grand time? Well, I pretty much spent the entirety of my trip being dragged to her friend's houses for tea because they were "GREAT" cooks. They didn't speak much English and I didn't speak much German, and they kept trying to cook "American" food for me. I was there 15 days and lost 32 pounds and didn't really have a single conversation the entire time." (I do love you Jillian, even if I will never vacation with you again.) Ahem. I think there was a topic around here somewhere.....

So here I was pulling out ornaments and remembering, or trying to remember, where I got them when I decided that it would be a good idea to write this stuff down. Especially since some of it has already gotten a little cloudy. My mom's Christmas tree has a lot of ornaments that everyone agrees she has had for a long time, but the origin is in question. Did I make that fake Ice Cream Sundae or did my brother? Was it 1st or 2nd grade. Since my mom's ornaments are mired in a bog of cloudy memory, I decided to write down anything important about my Christmas decorations.

Of course, deciding to start this after I have had a few glasses of wine mean that I am currently (because I am kind of drifting between this blog entry and decoration logging) writing down entries that consist of statements like "Ornaments XYZ, purchased in a spending binge at Pottery Barn after Christmas sale sometime between 2007 and 2010. Not really that important, but very pretty." And, "Inherited from Carl, I don't know when or where he got it, but it is kind of ugly, so I don't usually put it on the tree." I am debating on telling the truth on some of them. Because for every IMPORTANT ornament purchased at a family reunion or on a honeymoon, there is one that I would have to fess up to buying so that my 4 year old would just shut the heck up and let me finish my Target shopping in peace. And that doesn't seem like a very sentimental remembrance that someone is going to want to read in the future. Although, sometimes I think that grandparents could use a reminder that, as much as they might wish things to the contrary, their kids weren't angels who always behaved and showed respect when it was due. I think those items I will wait until tomorrow when the wine has passed my system to make a final judgement call on.

So tell me, what kind of decorations for the season do you have? Do you decorate like my late husband, a tree full of cheap ball ornaments? Do you have a menorah that has been a family heirloom? Do you know where your Christmas tree ornaments came from? Good memories or bad, let me know.