Let's dispense with the food first, since I am not sure that my actual blog post will make anyone want to eat.........
Monday nights are always an low cooking night around here. It is just me and the kidlet and we have an after dinner engagement to go to. So when I saw heart shaped cheese ravioli at Costco last week, it looked the perfect thing to have the night before Valentine's day and to serve to a kid as leftovers for lunch on the actual holiday. We spruced them up a tad bit by adding the last couple of tablespoons of cream to the last cup of a Classico Spaghetti sauce jar and nuked that up. Combined with a green salad and you have dinner in less than 15 mins. Hallelujah.
Since I have been reading about what kids eat, or how to get them to eat other stuff, I thought I would add a quick note about A. eats. Mostly she eats what we eat, but a little tweaked. There are a few things she absolutely won't eat. Lettuce, or other leaves are primary. But polenta and meat she thinks is "stringy" also are the no go list. So when we have salad, she has all the stuff that would be in a salad but with no lettuce. Chicken, carrots, tomatoes and avocado all hit the plate and are eaten. Last night is the only night that I will allow her to go off menu from the adults. There wasn't anything on that plate she would eat.....so she was allowed to have leftover mac & cheese from lunch with peas and a carrot stick. Nights when there is nothing that will work for her are pretty few and far between around here, usually she will eat the meat or veg and I have been known to supplement her plate with a fruit the rest of us don't have. This is not to say that I believe this to work for everyone, because honestly, I have no idea how much of her good eating habits are parenting and how much is just her personality. I would like to take credit, but it seems presumptuous considering no amount of modeling, cajoling, bribing and praising will get her to eat more than a bite of lettuce, sauteed greens or any orange winter squash. And getting her to swallow that bite is even harder.
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And now, on to a story. If potty humor or talk isn't for you, please feel free to skip this.
A. has already lost her privilege of playing out front in record time. While I was cooking dinner, she was out in the front with the neighbor's son, T. I went to the window to give them their 5 min warning and didn't see A. I asked T. where A. was and he said she was in the side yard. I yelled out to A. to come back into the front where I can see her from the windows. To which she replied that she couldn't. Puzzled, and a little annoyed at the lack of jumping to do my bidding, I informed her that she better have a good reason. To which she yelled at the top of her lungs, "T. MADE me POOP and I don't have anything to wipe with."
Oh. Sweet. Baby. Jesus. Did my kid just announce to me and all the neighbors within yelling distance that she dropped a deuce (in the vernacular) in my flower bed and was standing in said bed with NO PANTS ON???!!!??
Several things happened all at once. T. denied the charge. (No shit kid. Ha, see what I did there?) The 20-something single guy who lives across the street looked up from whatever he was doing to his enormous RV, immediately dropped his gaze, and hustled back into his house. And I said, "WHAT!?" And then deciding that she was clearly too young for a prank this elaborate, shut the window and hustled myself outside.
A. was in fact in the far side yard, behind a bush, pants around the ankles. There was evidence that she had, uh, done some business back there. I picked her up by the armpits and proceeded to carry her into the house exactly as I found her, while she was explaining. T. was clearly embarrassed to be greeted by the naked bottom of his playmate and averted his eyes. (Nakedness! And a Girl! Who isn't related to me! The HORROR!!!) She was insistent that T. had "made" her. I told her that was bunk, so she said, "Well, I said I had to go to the bathroom and T. said 'Pee in a bush!'" Ok, that I believe. T. of course was quick with a denial as we were walking past, but I clearly had bigger poop to scoop. I sent him packing without discussion.
A. was sent to clean up and get ready for dinner while I dealt with the dreaded No. 2. Afterward, she was informed that she has had her outside alone card revoked for bad decision making. And much later, with a glass of wine in hand, it is almost kind of funny. In a really gross way. But I will never admit that to A.
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